4 years ago when I was 12 me and a good friend, Jake, were fooling around over a discord call. He gave me the email of a third friend who I will call Joe. I don't really remember whose idea the 'prank' was, wether it was mine or if it was Jake's but Jake made a new e-mail account called "Hey Kids" and said that we should send him prank e-mails to his school e-mail. I don't really remember who came up with the idea, if it was entirely me or if Jake got the idea and if I took it too far. This was the idea of the "prank" : We/I (I don't remember how much jake was involved) would pretend to be like Herbert from the show Faimly guy to Joe in e-mails. At the time I was watching alot of Herbert from faimly guy Like:"Herbert from faimly guy Plays Black Ops 2" or "Family Guy | Best of Herbert"I thought this stuff was hilarious at the time.The first e-mail that I/we sent was fairly mild. Something along the lines of: "Hey Joe do you want me to pick you up after school in my van, there's free candy. ect..."We both thought this was hilarious and were wheezing with laughter on this discord call. At this point I"took over" the prank, changing the e-mail password. (Before we had both been logged onto the e-mail and one of us was screensharing to the other one)I started to compose a new e-mail and stopped screen sharing. Jake was starting to get worried about what I was typing and kept telling me to start screensharing and to give him back the login information. I thought this was super funny and kept going.The email went something like thins.. "Hey joe come to my van... please send me "nudes" here are mine." I looked up "naked old man" on google and copied and pasted the first picture that came up.After a while, I gave back Jake the passcodes for the e-mail he made up that had sent the e-mails.He also had the pasword for Joe's e-mail and after our call ended he saw the email I had sent to Joe's school email. He was shocked and very disturbed. He deleted both emails sent to Joe's school email and then deleted them in trash. He did the same thing to the e-mail account he made that sent them. He also deleted the account that he made earlier that night. The next day at school everybody heard about what I did and I was harassed (rightfully ) for several days. After that everyone kinda forgot about it. I forgot about it and did not think about it much and the severity of what I had done certainly did not sink in. Me and Jake remained friends for a while after this. I kept asking him if he wanted to hang out and every time he would be uncomfortable and say that he could not because of ____ (He felt super creeped out by me) (rightfully) Later he left my scout troop and we did not talk.1 and 1/2 years later (in the summer)Jake dms me on discord and starts listing all the stuff I did. He wanted a confesstion (for me to say) I, John Smith did ___ and ___ ect... so he could screenshot it. I gave him an apology. He also wanted to me to admit another thing."another thing"One time when we were playing a first aid game where we had to carry one person around the room.Other he was being carried by me and other kids. They were tickling him. I grabbed his dick. I don't know why I did it and I thought it was funny at the time. I really think that this was a minor issue though and was somewhat forgivable.He invited me to a group chat with another older kid who was an "adult" (I don't think an 18 year old with autism really was one but it scared me alot at the time) I did not want to confess/apologize in the chat with the other guy so I kept going in the dms.I did not handle the confession/apology very well. I faked a mental disorder as a scapegoat at first for my irrational behavior. I would not pair my name with anything ( I, John Smith did ___ and ___ ect... ) because I told him "I could not give him and evidence to use against me" <--- stupid.I also lied about my microphone telling him it was broken when before he had heard background noice when I joined the call and forgot to turn it off.After a while Jake was getting impatient, he starting to swear at me and getting angry. Finally he told me if I admitted to it all he would go away and never talk about it again.I was under heavy emotional manipulation and anguish for an immature 14 year old and I so I did.Anyway, they he was like "I know your hearts pounding right now. I screenshoted the whole thing" *posts screenshots in the chat of parts of the conversation* "You don't who I'll send this to."After that he left the call and blocked me.I was so terrified that he would leak the secret. I didn’t stop thinking about it for weeks. The guilt I felt was unimaginable. I eventually forgot about it, but every now and then I'm reminded of it and feel terrible. For example, driving past his house or even near it.I'm 16 now and nothing more has come of it. Do you think he will ever leak the screenshots?I hope that posting this will vindicate me from all the guilt. I tried to be as unbiased as possible in the portrayal of it. I never meant to harm anyone although that is what definitely arose from my actions. I know what I did was deeply wrong and feel a tremendous guilt for what I did and for ruining a good friendship. This is not meant to be any kind of defense. Thanks for your time.
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