Pressure from parents leading me to drug abuse

I got into “entrepreneurship” 3 years ago, started multiple businesses, all failed until my recent one I have now. Within that 3 year journey I was introduced to adderall from an ex boyfriend. I took one and since then I’ve been able to complete as much work as possible in short amount of time. That was the only time I took it then up until now., I’m getting peer pressured from my mom, her boyfriend and my grandma to join the peace corps. Adding on I have a constant reminder that I need to pay my student loans in 4 months or your credit will be ruined.They think my best bet is to join the peace corps but I really don’t want to and when I tell them I don’t want to go they threaten to throw me out and live in my car.I’ve tried explaining to them about my business, how everything works, the ins and outs of what I’m teaching - my mom and her boyfriend just refuse to understand.They think my business is a failure/will fail and that I have student loans coming very soon and to just sign up for the peace corps. So I figured Since they won’t listen I’ll have to show them.Ive been lying to my mom and her boyfriend about sending in a fake application for the peace corps so they can get off my back and when they ask for details I just pull shit out of air and make something up.I’ve been pressured to make money. I need to launch my business so that I can make money. To make the launch happen sooner I’ve been abusing 30mg adderall to work overtime in a short amount of time. Yes it’s been working but I’m starting to notice it affecting my health and lifestyle as well.The adderall in the AM, ambien before going to sleep, 2 zzzquils and 2 melatonins then the cycle continues for 5days straight every week. And within those 5 days I don’t eat anything cause I’m so focused on work, the days I do have off I can’t stop eating. My muscles constantly hurt.All this pressure from mainly my mom and her boyfriend are driving me up the wall to keep abusing drugs so I can make my goals come sooner even though it’s weakening my health.I have no social life since I work all the time. I wanted to talk to my grandma about my drug abuse but I’m wary. I feel so alone handling this.